New neighbor has invited friends over, again. It never happens on Friday or Saturday nights but always inevitably end up on a day where normal people have to work the next day. They never show up until after 8:30 and currently this bunch is still here, they have gotten progressively louder, and show no signs of leaving. I have a headache. It's all very awkward. Should I go ask them again? For the third time since they moved in recently? I don't want to come across as nagging but our apartment is not sound proof at all. I have tried knocking on the wall as politely as I can (door knocking variety) to try to remind him that you have a neighbor, hi, remember we've talked about this before? It seemed to work at first, to my relief, because I've been tossing and turning for a while and don't feel like getting up and getting dressed enough so I can go knock on his door to tell them to keep it down. Then it started again. Refraction about five minutes.
I need to find something useful to do until they leave.
20110227
20110224
Labmate's graduating!
She's just successfully defended her thesis to her committee (15 min grilling post presentation, it looked like) so now as soon as they approve of the formatting for her dissertation & get the paperwork process she'd have graduated. Before she left for the day (her family's in town) she turned to me and said "It's possible! You can do it!" and given that this is her 8th year (she has 3? 4? different strains of mice she had to establish herself) this is encouraging, as I only so far have 1 strain of mice that's already made.
But she's a friend and we share a bay and commiserate over the PI so this is a lot of excitement, as vicarious as it is. I feel a bit like jumping up and down because omg! She's DONE!
But she's a friend and we share a bay and commiserate over the PI so this is a lot of excitement, as vicarious as it is. I feel a bit like jumping up and down because omg! She's DONE!
20110221
20110220
lol brain
As I was falling asleep last night my brain was shuffling through the photos of some buildings I've seen recently and I find myself thinking about the onion-shaped cupolas. More specifically, my mind was idly wondering what they are for because it's not exactly the most practical shape for...most things that I can think of, actually and so I was wondering if they had a purpose besides ornamental. At which point my brain promptly supplied, I quote, "That's where they keep the bats!"
Being half asleep at the time, it took me a moment to track what thought had just crossed myself. And then I started to laugh because a) even half asleep, the idea of those places as some kind of bat hotel is patently ridiculous and b) I cannot think of Ivan Braginsky and "bats in the belfry" in the same sentence without wanting to snicker. So there I was, at some point near ten pm, lying in the dark and giggling. It was not one of my saner moments.
Grocery shopping today and lab later in the afternoon (which means no parking space when I get back). Too tired to bake this week (though I probably should) and currently have random craving for pudding. (Tried kamaboko last week. It tastes like very salty, very rubbery --worse than fishball rubbery-- artificial crab meat. I didn't like it very much.)
Being half asleep at the time, it took me a moment to track what thought had just crossed myself. And then I started to laugh because a) even half asleep, the idea of those places as some kind of bat hotel is patently ridiculous and b) I cannot think of Ivan Braginsky and "bats in the belfry" in the same sentence without wanting to snicker. So there I was, at some point near ten pm, lying in the dark and giggling. It was not one of my saner moments.
Grocery shopping today and lab later in the afternoon (which means no parking space when I get back). Too tired to bake this week (though I probably should) and currently have random craving for pudding. (Tried kamaboko last week. It tastes like very salty, very rubbery --worse than fishball rubbery-- artificial crab meat. I didn't like it very much.)
20110218
Still holding, still here
I have to go in and check my experiment in the morning tomorrow. Recruitment weekend is now and I have to present a poster, also tomorrow, at ten-ish, the session being two hours. I have to go and collect data from my mice at around five tomorrow afternoon. In addition, I will have to finish putting together my presentation for next Wednesday this weekend, which should require at least three hours of uninterrupted time, preferably five, which will give me enough time to memorize the information as I go through it and double check for typos.
Given this is the case, I've given up and decided just to spend most of tomorrow in lab instead, with my poster tube and the high speed internet. It will be peaceful. I will be productive. In my breaks I will explore our lab's old stash of candy and stare at a lot of photos and resolutely not go insane.
Sounds like a plan.
Given this is the case, I've given up and decided just to spend most of tomorrow in lab instead, with my poster tube and the high speed internet. It will be peaceful. I will be productive. In my breaks I will explore our lab's old stash of candy and stare at a lot of photos and resolutely not go insane.
Sounds like a plan.
20110213
This, is grad school
I had a dream last night where I'd forgotten the time for my candidacy exam until five minutes before and then had to run off to find the projector, which didn't work right. Then I realized there was a bit of extra material that I should have had, but someone didn't put it back where it was supposed to be and so I ended up spending way more time than I should tracking it down. At that point I was ten to fifteen minutes late, however, none of my committee members showed up and I realized that I had forgotten to send them a reminder email the day before (nevermind you sent an email the week before, in grad school you quickly learn to send a reminder the day before). At that point the gnawing anxiety cum nausea quickly became overwhelming and I realized, to my horror, that what I had thought was anxiety was in fact an acute bout of stomach flu and had to go home. The next day I was sitting around and contemplating what I should tell my committee, since I obviously need to tell them something. I was considering whether rescheduling was possible and recalled that I do have a deadline for this sort of thing that I need to finish everything by, and that yesterday was the only day in the next two months when everyone on the committee had time (also, true to experience). Somewhere around there the nausea swelled again and I woke up panicking, with a greater appreciation of the phrase "stomach in knots" than I had ever cared to learn, and it took me far too long to realize that the candidacy exam was four months ago.
It was a very, very realistic dream.
(I am out of practice for dream retention, but I can still pick up around 15%, out of residual training.)
(My God the things I picked up, back when summers meant time off.)
This was how my subconscious is coping with the four presentations that are still left: badly. But at least it's coping. It's deeply reassuring to know, upon waking, that there's no way this scenario can happen exactly as is in real life because I trust my ability to remember (or at least scribble things down in multiple places in brightly colored ink), and it will hold. The closest approximation in real life would be a case where there is a sudden health issue severe enough that I would need to reschedule, but in that case I'm more likely to react with resignation (c'est la vie) than panic.
And now for something completely different.
Okay, I lied, it sort of ties back. Well.
According to blogger I first started making attempts at dating back in June of last year (whoa I lasted six months?), by the way of online dating. After some trial-and-errors, I ended up sticking with OkCupid. I am ending this particular experiment, and on Valentine's Day seemed apropos. (Well, I'd do it tomorrow except I have a list of experiments and I'm pretty sure all I'll want to do at the end of tomorrow is sleep, I'll have a bit more time than just sleeping but certainly not enough time to write. Writing takes me a long time. Some day I'll figure out a way to diagram my thought processes and just post that instead.)
(Account has been deleted.)
This is what the stats looks like from my experience:
I also kept track of a bunch of other stuff, but even the data I presented may not be conclusive, given the sampling bias -- the type of people who visit OkCupid is possibly a less skewed representation of the singles population than, say, Geek 2 Geek, but the fact remains that the internet is more popular among the younger generations and dating sites are...well, you can draw more conclusions from that than what I have shown, because there's no one to compare my data against and you shouldn't trust an experiment, with N=1, that has no control. (Har.)
Other miscellaneous info: I have been on a "date" with three different people, though I'm not sure how much you'd count the meet-up from this sort of thing as a date. It seemed all very none standard but then, to be fair, two of the three people I met up with were very none standard as well. I am friends with three of the people still, though one of them is not the same person that I met up with. There is only one person that I went out with more than once but I called that off in the beginning of this month.
My conclusions from this is that I like going out, when I have the time to. Going out with people who are nice and who like me and whom I like is fun. I really don't give a flying fig about the actual relationship part, and the the guilt from that particular realization, in combination with the insanity that is this month were the main reasons why I called the last one off. The sad truth is that the desire for something is more beautiful than the real thing, and as much as I like the idea of romance the truth is that I can't really be bothered to deal with it myself (someone around, all the time, seems a bit co-dependent and invasive) (-- a matter of personal preference, I have nothing but respect for people who are capable of deriving some kind of soulful satisfaction from being around their special person) (and yes, I know it's voluntary but you still have to make time for that other person -- given how important person is supposed to be, you should always find time -- and the effort in juggling four different collaborator is complicated enough without the need to try to find free time during the week days to do whatever it is that couples do) (what do normal couples do? All the people I've talked to have one or both sides of the equation in grad school, so it seems to involve a lot of staggering around in exhaustion singularly or together). Here's something else I learned from SHERLOCK: the phrase "married to your work". It is very applicable in my case. I think I'll stick with that.
I also have to go to lab now. There needs to be more tea.
It was a very, very realistic dream.
(I am out of practice for dream retention, but I can still pick up around 15%, out of residual training.)
(My God the things I picked up, back when summers meant time off.)
This was how my subconscious is coping with the four presentations that are still left: badly. But at least it's coping. It's deeply reassuring to know, upon waking, that there's no way this scenario can happen exactly as is in real life because I trust my ability to remember (or at least scribble things down in multiple places in brightly colored ink), and it will hold. The closest approximation in real life would be a case where there is a sudden health issue severe enough that I would need to reschedule, but in that case I'm more likely to react with resignation (c'est la vie) than panic.
And now for something completely different.
Okay, I lied, it sort of ties back. Well.
According to blogger I first started making attempts at dating back in June of last year (whoa I lasted six months?), by the way of online dating. After some trial-and-errors, I ended up sticking with OkCupid. I am ending this particular experiment, and on Valentine's Day seemed apropos. (Well, I'd do it tomorrow except I have a list of experiments and I'm pretty sure all I'll want to do at the end of tomorrow is sleep, I'll have a bit more time than just sleeping but certainly not enough time to write. Writing takes me a long time. Some day I'll figure out a way to diagram my thought processes and just post that instead.)
(Account has been deleted.)
This is what the stats looks like from my experience:
N=15
avg age = 26, with stdev of 5 years
education level = most common: college
occupation = most common: computer
avg messages exchanged per person = 3, with stdev of 4
I also kept track of a bunch of other stuff, but even the data I presented may not be conclusive, given the sampling bias -- the type of people who visit OkCupid is possibly a less skewed representation of the singles population than, say, Geek 2 Geek, but the fact remains that the internet is more popular among the younger generations and dating sites are...well, you can draw more conclusions from that than what I have shown, because there's no one to compare my data against and you shouldn't trust an experiment, with N=1, that has no control. (Har.)
Other miscellaneous info: I have been on a "date" with three different people, though I'm not sure how much you'd count the meet-up from this sort of thing as a date. It seemed all very none standard but then, to be fair, two of the three people I met up with were very none standard as well. I am friends with three of the people still, though one of them is not the same person that I met up with. There is only one person that I went out with more than once but I called that off in the beginning of this month.
My conclusions from this is that I like going out, when I have the time to. Going out with people who are nice and who like me and whom I like is fun. I really don't give a flying fig about the actual relationship part, and the the guilt from that particular realization, in combination with the insanity that is this month were the main reasons why I called the last one off. The sad truth is that the desire for something is more beautiful than the real thing, and as much as I like the idea of romance the truth is that I can't really be bothered to deal with it myself (someone around, all the time, seems a bit co-dependent and invasive) (-- a matter of personal preference, I have nothing but respect for people who are capable of deriving some kind of soulful satisfaction from being around their special person) (and yes, I know it's voluntary but you still have to make time for that other person -- given how important person is supposed to be, you should always find time -- and the effort in juggling four different collaborator is complicated enough without the need to try to find free time during the week days to do whatever it is that couples do) (what do normal couples do? All the people I've talked to have one or both sides of the equation in grad school, so it seems to involve a lot of staggering around in exhaustion singularly or together). Here's something else I learned from SHERLOCK: the phrase "married to your work". It is very applicable in my case. I think I'll stick with that.
I also have to go to lab now. There needs to be more tea.
20110212
But when's time for tea?
I seemed to have hit a peak for insanity this month.
Have to go into lab again today. Ivy's vaguely glitchy. Had to choose new paper for presentation and so will be spending this weekend, most likely, working on that presentation. Got assigned to present at the local neurodevelopment meeting in March so as soon as the paper thing is done I expect I shall have to prepare for that. (Why can't the PI wait one more quarter? Then I can just use the committee meeting as the practice run for the general presentation.) I'm still not sure how this happened, but it looks like I got volunteered both recruitment weekends for a poster presentation. Still not sure if I have to host someone yet, but the first weekend is next weekend and so hopefully someone will mail me at some point to let me know.
Darn it, and it's almost tax-time again. I'm funded by two different sources, one of them doesn't show up on the W-2 and so there's more arithmetic for me.
Lab mate got a manuscript accepted yesterday. PI got the lab chocolate, cake, and a bottle of champagne (carried in an ice bucket -- sorry, no photos). Afterwards we all signed the bottle in gold paint-pen, because that's how the lab tradition goes, it seems (the person who published get a signed bottle to keep). Of all the random lab traditions around, I think this one is sweet. In more sense than one.
Have to go into lab again today. Ivy's vaguely glitchy. Had to choose new paper for presentation and so will be spending this weekend, most likely, working on that presentation. Got assigned to present at the local neurodevelopment meeting in March so as soon as the paper thing is done I expect I shall have to prepare for that. (Why can't the PI wait one more quarter? Then I can just use the committee meeting as the practice run for the general presentation.) I'm still not sure how this happened, but it looks like I got volunteered both recruitment weekends for a poster presentation. Still not sure if I have to host someone yet, but the first weekend is next weekend and so hopefully someone will mail me at some point to let me know.
Darn it, and it's almost tax-time again. I'm funded by two different sources, one of them doesn't show up on the W-2 and so there's more arithmetic for me.
Lab mate got a manuscript accepted yesterday. PI got the lab chocolate, cake, and a bottle of champagne (carried in an ice bucket -- sorry, no photos). Afterwards we all signed the bottle in gold paint-pen, because that's how the lab tradition goes, it seems (the person who published get a signed bottle to keep). Of all the random lab traditions around, I think this one is sweet. In more sense than one.
20110206
What I'll be googling tomorrow
I have made a cup of tea. The tea bag was defective and got ground tea leaves into the tea, as well as onto the counter and possibly the floor. Clearly this was going to be one of those days.
Putting together the presentation for lab meeting yesterday took me about five hours. This is taking into the account that I had spent around two hours during the past week analyzing the data that I never got around to sorting.
The plastic container for grape tomatoes was defective as well, and I ended up fishing for tomatoes in the back trunk, because there were turns and the apparently more oblong shape of this particular cultivar of tomatoes (what the heck, Firefox does not recognize the term "cultivar"?) was not enough to, like an egg, prevent the tomatoes from rolling too far.
Two of my labmates have harangued the rest of the lab into taking a bet on the Superbowl (I'm on the Pittsburgh side and had no idea what "Green Bay" was or was from until Friday afternoon).
I still need to find a paper to present.
[edit 9:42]
Need break. With find time to re-watch Sherlock at some point. Have realized have never seen tv-adaptions of Holmes before this. Would like to, as it's educational. Someone link me?
[edit 13:03]
Was absent-minded enough to use baking soda instead of baking powder while baking. Result tastes atrocious. Ivy (which contained my lab presentation) had the same same issue with the display again. Had to flash the BIOS twice. Still haven't found paper.
Putting together the presentation for lab meeting yesterday took me about five hours. This is taking into the account that I had spent around two hours during the past week analyzing the data that I never got around to sorting.
The plastic container for grape tomatoes was defective as well, and I ended up fishing for tomatoes in the back trunk, because there were turns and the apparently more oblong shape of this particular cultivar of tomatoes (what the heck, Firefox does not recognize the term "cultivar"?) was not enough to, like an egg, prevent the tomatoes from rolling too far.
Two of my labmates have harangued the rest of the lab into taking a bet on the Superbowl (I'm on the Pittsburgh side and had no idea what "Green Bay" was or was from until Friday afternoon).
I still need to find a paper to present.
[edit 9:42]
Need break. With find time to re-watch Sherlock at some point. Have realized have never seen tv-adaptions of Holmes before this. Would like to, as it's educational. Someone link me?
[edit 13:03]
Was absent-minded enough to use baking soda instead of baking powder while baking. Result tastes atrocious. Ivy (which contained my lab presentation) had the same same issue with the display again. Had to flash the BIOS twice. Still haven't found paper.
20110205
It's going around
Thesis writing, I have been able to observe, is a bit like a viral infection. It causes exhaustion, nausea (and therefore inability to eat), headaches, &c. More importantly, it does seem to cause immune-depression, as that Wendy has gotten sick twice in two weeks now and had to go home early yesterday because she was running a fever (but she did manage to send off her draft to all her committee members and, more importantly, all her committee members are still here and can still make it to her defense date). After watching her flail around trying to analyze data and write at the same time and lying face down on her desk after drafts and drafts of it is coming back from our adviser covered in illegible blue scribbles, I, in the midst of acute pangs of sympathy (after changing the format for the qual and the candidacy exam we have to work with adviser on both now, and so I did the pages of blue scribbles thing, except my document was faaar shorter), had a truly horrifying revelation:
This is what I have to look forward to in a few years.
Which reminds me of the point where Wendy was looking at me blearily and said, "So you're aiming for this in ...three years, right?" (Six year graduation apparently being the shortest anyone who works with mice has ever accomplished, or something. Speaking of which, the pinworm infestation's gone away, except now all the mice going in and out still need to go through preventative treatment, which does affect behavior, which means I can't run any behavioral tests until this is over, which means that my own thesis-writing-pains just got delayed by three months and there's nothing I can do about it.) (I am just a little upset by this.)
Righto.
Meantime, I don't have to go into lab this weekend, though I do have to put together a presentation for lab meeting next week as well as find a decent paper to present for class / journal-club, so that will probably take up all weekend. In the after math of being introduced to Kate's ipad and griping about the fact that it's hugely impractical to have a giant drawer full of references, like I do, but that I can't just take notes on the computer because if the notes aren't right next to the text I sometimes forget what I'm talking about and also-- highlighting is USEFUL, I have discovered Xournal. It's for linux only (though I think there's a hack for mac somewhere) and it's brilliant. I have fallen into a green-orange color theme now (orange notes & green highlighter) and my read articles looks down right citrusy. Now if only I can figure out how to change the default settings somewhere.... (Still playing around. Also, it's been compared to Windows Journal for PC, which I haven't tried yet. More on that ... at some point, when I get around to installing a copy on Zen.)
This is what I have to look forward to in a few years.
Which reminds me of the point where Wendy was looking at me blearily and said, "So you're aiming for this in ...three years, right?" (Six year graduation apparently being the shortest anyone who works with mice has ever accomplished, or something. Speaking of which, the pinworm infestation's gone away, except now all the mice going in and out still need to go through preventative treatment, which does affect behavior, which means I can't run any behavioral tests until this is over, which means that my own thesis-writing-pains just got delayed by three months and there's nothing I can do about it.) (I am just a little upset by this.)
Righto.
Meantime, I don't have to go into lab this weekend, though I do have to put together a presentation for lab meeting next week as well as find a decent paper to present for class / journal-club, so that will probably take up all weekend. In the after math of being introduced to Kate's ipad and griping about the fact that it's hugely impractical to have a giant drawer full of references, like I do, but that I can't just take notes on the computer because if the notes aren't right next to the text I sometimes forget what I'm talking about and also-- highlighting is USEFUL, I have discovered Xournal. It's for linux only (though I think there's a hack for mac somewhere) and it's brilliant. I have fallen into a green-orange color theme now (orange notes & green highlighter) and my read articles looks down right citrusy. Now if only I can figure out how to change the default settings somewhere.... (Still playing around. Also, it's been compared to Windows Journal for PC, which I haven't tried yet. More on that ... at some point, when I get around to installing a copy on Zen.)
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